


Will you Chant for me?

by AbandonedbySSB (sightsoblind)



Series: Finished Works [13]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Blooming Rose, F/M, Grief/Mourning, It wrote itself, Not Beta Read, Post-All That Remains, Spanking, Starts dirty ends sweet, The Chantry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-18
Updated: 2015-02-19
Packaged: 2018-03-13 10:41:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3378539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sightsoblind/pseuds/AbandonedbySSB
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Marian Hawke is broken. Never is this more evident than in the events following her Mother's death. She wants someone to touch to her as they read the Chant of Light. Angry at the Maker and his bride she tries to get a man of faith to do it. Cullen turns her down. Sebastian does not comply as planned.<br/>This is an abandoned idea for the story in It wasn't supposed to be like this. http://archiveofourown.org/works/3331844/chapters/7285016<br/>It may eventually come back in some form but I couldn't get the idea out of my head.<br/>I also may have been reading too much Hawke/Cullen fiction.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The incident

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Semper_Paratus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Semper_Paratus/gifts).



> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDxgSvJINlU  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q-pXD0FXLQ8  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SmVAWKfJ4Go  
> Inspirational songs I listened to while writing
> 
> The only back ground you need for this version of Hawke would be Chapter 2 of It wasn't supposed to be like this. The boy and the Hound  
> http://archiveofourown.org/works/3331844/chapters/7287047 Direct link to chapter  
> updated song  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DGS3TaHHNBw was just given this song for this work I loves it

Knight Captain Cullen took a deep breath and stared at the large red doors before him. The Knight Commanders drive to see recruitment up had attracted many less devoted sorts and a full 20 recruits were missing he was hoping to find more than a few beyond but first he had to make it inside. With a deep breath of the last clean air he would breath for a while he pushed the doors open and forged ahead. The clink of glasses and gentle laughter of men and women alike washed over him bringing the smells sweet wine and heavy perfume with it. He was only halfway to the Blooming Rose's counter when a familiar voice called out to him.

"KNIGHT CAPTAIN CULLEN! YER PERFEC'!" Turning he came face to face with Marian Hawke deep in her cups throwing herself at him... literally.  Her hands curled around the neck of his breastplate and pulled him down toward her. "Knight Captain I need your help!"  She stage whispered loud enough to inform the entire brothel. "I want you to fuck me while Reciting the Chant of Light! I want the Maker to KNOW he can get FUCKED!" She was drunk. She was drunk and a mage in robes hitting on him in the middle of a brothel filled with recruits. If it came out that she was a mage right now there would be no convincing anyone she was harmless. She was the last of the Amell line after her mothers death two days ago. He had investigated the scene and the images still haunted him. She pressed her full length against him and he was thankful for the full plate between them. "I'll give you fifty sov'rens if you can do it in a Starkhaven accent. I woulda jus' asked 'Bastion to do it but vows and shit. But your vows gotta be different. Aveline was married to a Templer once ya know." Cullen looked around the Rose and counted twelve of the missing recruits staring right at them. Two had the courtesy of trying to sneak out instead.

"Don't you have a companion you could turn to Serah Hawke? Don't you and the um... Elf have such an arrangement."

"Fenris..." The name escaped her mouth in a hiss with such venom he physically recoiled. "Fenris left me apparently I fucked his memories RIGHT BACK! And that's enough to send him running like I tried to put him back in chains. Then Mother dies cut into a thousand pieces by a filthy fucking Maleficar blood mage."

Cullen didn't know what to say. He stood there a moment in shocked silence knowing something needed to be done and soon.

"Perhaps Serah Hawke you should come with me a moment." He grabbed her by the elbow and steered her into a vacant room.

"Oh Andraste's sweet tits Knight Captain! Remind me to make you breakfas' tomorrow!"

Leaving the door slightly ajar he tried to make an exit quickly. But she was tugging at his straps and buckles and making an unfortunate bit of progress already. "Serah Hawke I need you to wait here just a moment for me. I will return directly."

She scowled "No... you were going to read me the Chant of Light." Marian kissed him then. Her lips soft and full as he had always dreamed them to be.  His hands drifted to the swell of her hips that his eyes had followed so often as she would walk away. Always walking away after running up. It was... distracting. His lips parted against the questing of her tongue and the taste of wine filled his mouth. He knew he had to stop he or he would never forgive himself.

He tried desperately to extract himself once more knowing he would need a better excuse. "I uh... I just need to go get my copy of the Chant. I doubt you want me forgetting lines in the middle do you?"

"Oh Knight Captain! We should do the whole thing right through! Like we're in Val'Whatever!" She swayed and collapsed back onto the bed.

He heaved a sigh of relief and put his armor back to rights quickly. He slipped out the door shutting it fully behind him this time.  Striding to the counter he stared Madame Lusine down. "If you do not allow any but Serah Hawke's standard company into that room before she is sober I will forget all I have found here today." She nodded gently and he turned on his recruits. "All of you... OUT NOW!" He marched them back to the Ferry sending them across to the Gallows. Six more to find and he could finally retire for the night, but first he felt the need to step into the Chantry a moment and pray.

 

* * *

 

Kneeling in a pew head bowed in prayer he repeated the again "O Maker, hear my cry: Guide me through the blackest nights, Steel my heart against the temptations of the wicked, Make me to rest in the warmest places. " A Brother walked up then sitting beside him.

"Do you need someone to speak to Ser Knight?" He asked quietly.

Before Cullen knew what he was doing he poured it all out. Confessions of things he had never dared speak.

"There is a woman. Fierce and beautiful and... broken. I have thought of her for years but its impossible. In the beginning it was only because she was apostate but Maker she became something else so quickly. She reminded me so much of someone I knew in Kinloch Hold. Tonight she offered herself to me. But she was drunk and not just that but asked me to recite the Chant. She's just so angry after everything that's happened recently. I think she's taking it out on the Maker because She blames only herself." When it was all out he felt lighter somehow. until he looked at the Brother. The man seemed deep in thought.

"She asked you to recite... Oh my." He had a Starkhaven accent and didn't Marian say something about vows. Cullen's jaw dropped.

"Excuse me brother if I'm being to forward but, Is your name Bastion?" Please maker do not let him have confessed to the man Marian Hawke had openly stated she would rather have been there.

"It is, after a sort. I am Brother Sebastian Vael." Seeing the smile light his face Cullen couldn't help but feel a stab of jealousy in his gut. There was no good reason for the Maker to have made any man so pretty. It simply wasn't fair to the rest of the male population.

Cullen cleared his throat and stood. "I may have left the young lady in an empty room at the Blooming Rose. She is expecting a return I never intended to make. If you think someone could go and pick her up. Serah Hawke could truly use a friend now." With that he left as fast as he could manage feeling worse than when he had walked in.

Sebastian started at the back of the retreating Templar. Hawke wouldn't... Surely she was still too drunk to have left the estate. Right? What was he thinking she was Marian Hawke. He'd seen her kill bands of thugs six sheets to the wind. In a moment Sebastian was up. He grabbed his bow and slung it on over his Chantry robes on his way out the door.

 

* * *

 

By the doors of the Blooming Rose sat Payne trying to paw the door open his very presence stopping people from entering or exiting. His Presence confirmed half of what the Templar had told him. If the other half were true... He forced himself to take a deep breath it did no good to get angry at Hawke until she was sober and could explain herself.

Pushing the door open he said, "Find your Mistress boy. That's a good boy." Payne made his way directly to a door and waited. Sebastian went directly in glad he didn't have to talk to anyone inside.

Marian lay face down on the still fully made bed. He breathed a sigh of relief. She appeared unmolested. He seated himself on the edge of the bed. "Hawke, Hawke you need to wake up. It's time to go home." He reached out to shake her leg gently and startled when his hand hit bare calf. She stirred and looked up at him.

"I can't. Knight Captain Cullen is going to come back and read me the Chant. He was going to touch me and not run away afterwards. OH!" She sat up suddenly, coming to rest inches from his face. "And my name is Marian!"

"Hawke... Where are you're pants?' He could feel the tips of his ears burning and something tightening in his chest.

"Don't need em! Don't want em!"

This set Sebastian on a search around the room since he couldn't exactly remove her from this place without pants. When the door creaked open his bow was off his back arrow notched with the speed of a practiced archer. It was only the man from the bar. "Ser, You can't be here this room is occupied."

"Not for long. She's going home. She's too drunk to be left here on her own." Payne growled and advanced slowly on the man. He lifted his hands in surrender and backed out slowly.

It was then that Sebastian noticed the window hanging open. He looked out and sure enough there on the street below were Hawke's pants. Currently being picked up by a thug. He shouted but it only made the man run off.

In three quick strides he crossed to the bed and wrapped her in the coverlet making sure her head stuck out the top. "Hawke can you breathe?"

The intensity of the glare surprised him as she hissed! "I. Want. To. Hear. The. Chant."

He was surprised by the slight swell of anger in his chest. Hawke was not exactly devout but she had never bordered on blasphemy before. He less than gently tossed her over his shoulder and stalked out of the brothel. Payne trotting at his heels he felt much better about being unable to access his bow. In a fight he'd rather have the Mabari at his side than Merrill any day.

"SEBASTIAN YOUR INTERFERING WITH THE EXALTED MARCH ON MY VAGINA!" When her head bounced off the stone pillar he could not absolutely say it was an accident. When they reached her door he tried the knob and was surprised to find it locked. He began knocking before Hawke's quiet voice stopped him. "Ain't nobody home."

"Where are they Hawke?" He had never known Marian Hawke when she had lost someone before. The others assured him she would just go on. She kept busy and got a little angry but simply moved on. Suddenly though he felt like this was different. Somehow this time it had to be. An Apostate hitting on a Knight Captain drunk in the middle of a brothel could not be normal for her and he was struck with the sudden fear she had fired them all.  Dispensing of ones staff was on the list of things Brothers were told to look for in parishioners that were considering ending their lives.

 "Gave em time off. Orana just saves and saves and works and works. I told her not to come home till she bought three things she didn't need she just liked. Sandal got invited to a big ole' enchanting thing. I made them go they were already planning it." Sebastian let out a sigh of relief. "Besides Mother can't spend my money anymore why can't they I have too much."

"Well where are your keys?" He said finding it harder to retain the formality of her name with her bottom so close to his face with her slung over his shoulder.

That's when she said the three words that made his heart drop out. "In my pants." His lock picks were with his armor and he was still in Chantry Robes. The Hanged man was too far. A blind man would know she and Fenris had had some spat she hadn't spoken to him since the day before her mother died and he had been conspicuously absent from the funeral.  Gamlen's house was even farther. The closest safe place to wait until morning was the Chantry. At least he could keep an eye on her there until she was sober. So off they went he thanked her silently not for the first time for her commitment to weeding the gangs out of the night streets. Three months ago he would never have made it across the courtyard much less all the way to the Chantry. He pushed the door to the chantry open and the three companions slid inside.

There was a young Mother just getting ready to begin snuffing the candles for the night her eyes widening at the sight. Sebastian gave her a nod "Mother, Serah Hawke has had too much to drink and has locked herself out of her home. I'd like to let her sleep it off. Her mother just died and I'm worried she might..." His words choked in his throat. For the first time he realized he really was afraid of it. _Hawke was strong._ Aveline would say. _Aww Choir Boy she just needs some time._ Varric would try to console. Merrill would ramble on about something with the Dalish that he never bothered to listen to anyway. Isabella would just buy her more drinks until she swore it off for what would not be the last time.  Anders would argue how this was a symptom of the larger plight of the mages. Fenris would sit and watch in silent reproach not stepping in until the danger was immediate. Sebastian could not wait for the blade to be at her wrist. Her hurting was enough for him to want to stop it. She never questioned when he asked for help. She had killed over a hundred men over the ache in his heart over his family. But there was no one left for her to blame or kill. He had to do something.

The look on his face must have spoken more than the words he could not manage as the mother laid a hand gently upon his arm. "Do not worry Brother Sebastian. With friends like you to show her the Maker's love she'll be fine before you know it. For the one who repents, who has faith, Unshaken by the darkness of the world, She shall know true peace."

"Thank you Mother. I can finish your duties for the evening if you like? I don't think it's wise to let Serah Hawke alone in the Chantry at night. Especially not as she is now." The young Mother was more than happy to let him finish her duties. She had just acquired the latest installment of _Hard in Hightown_ and still had an hour of cleaning before her.

"Thank you Brother Sebastian I'll leave you to it then." She gave a quick bob and disappeared up the stairs to her private quarters.

"Fuck the Maker's love. I don't WANT to repent." Came the mumbled voice from behind him sounding almost asleep for which he was glad. But she was getting ever closer to outright blasphemy if he ignored the first part because she was drunk. 

"Hawke, Do us both a favor and stop talking." He carried her up to the benches and laid her across one. "Just get some sleep and we will talk in the morning." He turned to Payne. "Try to make sure she doesn't break her neck falling off anything." And with the nod the Mabari gave him he began to wonder how strong the bond between a Mabari and its master could be. He'd seen the same deep sadness in so many who had lost. Did Payne feel the loss of her mother just as keenly or was he simply sad because Hawke was sad? Either way he had much to do this evening. He doubted he would sleep tonight. Hawke and her pain weighed on him heaver than it should. He was a Brother in the Chantry. If he held onto these feeling Elthina would never let him reaffirm his vows.

He snuffed candles and then swept and scrubbed the floors. His mind turned inward trying to find a better reason than his regard for her that her loss of faith would anger him. When he finally settled to pray for her he was no closer to an answer.

* * *

 

"Someone needs to read the Chant. Chantries are just wrong without it." He looked up hoping her nap had sobered her but she stood there wearing less than before. She was down to her silken under shirt and her smalls. At least she wasn't...

"The Maker can get fucked you know. I'm tired of his shit."

"Hawke," Her name came out a warning this time.

"SEBASTIAN! My fucking name is Marian. Do you think you can remember that this time?"

"Hawke your drunk you need to sleep it off. We'll talk in the morning about the Maker or anything else you want but please, just stop."

"Or what you'll spank me too? You bit me you know." At this Sebastian was convinced she was quite far gone. He grabbed her by the arm and steered her back toward the benches Payne not helping in the slightest just standing there staring at the two of them.

"You are testing my patience Hawke. I might just take you up on that if you keep acting like a spoiled child striking out at her father because it rained on her nameday."

He set her on the bench and began looking for the blanket again to cover her once more. Hawke was not ready to give up though. "I wanted the Knight Captain to read me the chant while he fucked me to carry my hatred of him right to the ears of the Maker. With the cock of his most faithful and beloved inside me. I wanted him to know I hate him. I hate him for my Father, and for Bethany. I hate him for stealing Carver and killing Mother. I especially hate him for Fenris. I hope the Black City rots with the force of my hatred for him."

The sudden anger threatened to choke him. It wasn't right. She was cursing the maker in his own house. Everything he had done. Had she not had a chance to say good bye. To each of them in turn the Maker had kept them alive long enough for her to say goodbye. His family had been cold and buried before he even knew they were dead and in his sudden fit he moved back over to her his limbs shaking and his jaw clenched. "Take it back Hawke. Take it back. You're drunk and not making much sense. So take. It. Back."

She stepped closer challenging. He'd seen her bow up at merchants and nobles who had threatened her before. He'd seen the stubborn set of her jaw that belied her intent to not back down from this and he lost his temper. "You wanted to hear the chant?" He grabbed her arm and dragged her to the bench pushing her over it bent in half he laid his copy of the Canticle of Trials before her. "Read it Hawke!"

"Let go of me Seba..." But he cut her off fury evident in his voice.

"Read. The. Chant." His hand descended on her behind before she was very aware of what was going on. He had actually spanked her! _'Oh sweet Andraste. Please tell me I did not just enjoy that!'_ she thought to herself. Not willing to find out she began to read.

_"Maker, my enemies are abundant._   
_Many are those who rise up against me._   
_But my faith sustains me; I shall not fear the legion,_   
_Should they set themselves against me."_

 This time when she stopped he swatted her again his hand resting on her behind a moment after. There was a warmth where he had struck her and it curled right into her belly. Her insides clenched and she was glad he could not see her face as they were. He had her arm yanked behind her holding her in place bent over the back of a pew. He stood behind his other hand still resting gently and when he raised for a third swat she relaxed into it. and began to read once more a few verses further and a few more swats and she was on fire in a manner she had never been before. She was achy and wanting. It wasn't like the few stolen touches of her youth or the single night she had shared with Fenris. It was like the coals in the depths of a blacksmiths forge. She wanted to throw herself onto them and burn. Melt away all that clung to her and come out clean and new and so she read.

_"Maker, though the darkness comes upon me,_   
_I shall embrace the light. I shall weather the storm._   
_I shall endure._   
_What you have created, no one can tear asunder."_

Halting when he seemed to falter in his desire to punish her because she didn't have the strength to ask him to do it. The streets were too calm there was no fight to bleed her pain out. This was all she had and she clung to it as if she were drowning in the bay.

_"Though all before me is shadow,_   
_Yet shall the Maker be my guide._   
_I shall not be left to wander the drifting roads of the Beyond._   
_For there is no darkness in the Maker's Light_   
_And nothing that He has wrought shall be lost."_

 The strikes came steady now first one side than the other. The heat inside of her reaching heights she didn't know could be reached. She knew just beyond it was a wholeness she needed once more. To be reforged in the pain of her loss to find a way to feel it. She stopped completely this time taking a deep breath and pressed her head into the book before her. As if reading her thoughts as if knowing what she needed the strokes came faster covering her cheeks with steady sharp strikes until he landed one blow atop another across the middle in a steady rhythm that had her coming undone. Shame ran through her when she realized what had happened. She had just reached orgasm from being beaten, in the Chantry, by a Brother, reading the Chant of Light. Sebastian would never speak to her again.

"Hawke," His voice was softer now and she held her breath waiting for the next words to ask her to leave and not come back. "If you're finished. You need to finish. You've almost got all the way through. Marian lifted her head and nodded reading the last stanza.

_"Draw your last breath, my friends,_   
_Cross the Veil and the Fade and all the stars in the sky._   
_Rest at the Maker's right hand,_   
_And be Forgiven."_

 She finished and he let her up her vision was swimming and she realized there were tears in her eyes. Blinking them away she looked to him but all anger and fury was gone. His Features were soft, kind, worried and caring. She began to sob anew and collapsed into him his arms going around her as he led her to sit on the bench.

"Is there something more bothering you? You've been rambling a bit. Would you like to talk now that you're calmer?" He pulled her into his lap and tucked her head under his chin letting her pull her legs up into herself forming a ball there in his lap as he wrapped his arms around her.

"I can't do this Sebastian. Every one wants something and I can't do it alone I have no one."

"Fenris loves you Hawke. A fool could see he loves you." Her bitter laughter mixed with her sobs.

"Fenris left. That's why you haven't seen him. He walked out on me. He spent the night and then told me he didn't want me. Oh Maker Sebastian. Mother warned me. She said I loved too much and feared too little and it was going to come crumbling down on me someday. No one ever stays." The tears poured forth once more soaking through his robes. Sebastian could not understand the feeling blooming in his chest. He knew she hadn't told the others or they would have said something. Secrets did not last more than a moment among her band of misfits.

"I'm so sorry Hawke. I don't even know what to say."

"Its not your fault. I'm pretty sure I would have gone with the giant scary man too. But I got Payne and he's all I have left. You did more than you realize. I would never have made it this far without him."

Sebastian's brow furrowed. "Hawke your not making any sense."

"Call me Marian. Just once. You called me Myra in the kennels. Just say my name."

His lips quirked slightly she was still drunker than he realized and after the last few minutes exhausted he was certain as well. "I'll call you by your given name only when you prove you're not out of your mind still."

She lifted her head and laid a hand on his cheek. Suddenly her being there in his lap it was so much less of a friendly gesture of comfort and friendship. Her lips a hairs breath away from him she whispered her breath ghosting over his face. "It was in Amaranthine. Your name day had happened recently and you were visiting the Howe's. They gave you a puppy. A Mabari puppy but your father had just committed you to the Chantry. You kissed me. You kissed me before anyone else. I would have let you do anything you wanted you were so handsome. But you're father came in and dragged you off. You handed him to me and asked me to give him a good home and you called me Myra. Please, I know you can't love me. But I have never stopped loving you since that day. Just please call me Marian. Just so I can hear it."

Sebastian's head was reeling. She had tasted of apples when he kissed her. She had been eating one watching the Mabari run. He remembered everything.

 

 

_Prince Sebastian Vale was a known rake at the tender age of seventeen. He loved women of all sorts tall, short, fat, thin, it didn't matter. They were soft and yielding against him and he tried very hard to make sure they never felt used. Never promised more than he could give and only took so much as they wished to give. He had never had to actively pursue a girl before this one. She had hair dark as night and a wild look in her eyes. She used to hang around the dog kennels and near the training runs watching the Mabari. But by the time he spotted her and tried to make his way over she was always gone. He almost became convinced she was avoiding him. Then his master plan came in. He talked Nathaniel out of a puppy. He was promised pick of the litter when they were weened the next day. The very next morning he found a seat in a tree and waited with the patience only archery could teach every other goal or thought forgotten. He had to speak to this girl that haunted the edges of his vision like a man bewitched. But solid as any creature she came slipping out from the tree line and his breath caught in his throat. She slid her fingers into the dirt and began to whisper ancient words filled with power. He'd never kissed a mage before and if his father intended to follow through on this daft plan he knew this was his last chance to try. The Mabari came over and she let them sniff her fingers and she fed them tiny scraps of a meal she had brought with her until only a single green apple remained. He watched her lips slide over it as she ate and whispered to the dogs no more magic after the first to calm them and bring them close. Silently he slid from the tree and approached._

_"Their beautiful animals. I was just gifted one for my nameday. It's such a shame I wont be able to keep him. My father will likely leave him out in the rain in Starkhaven once I go off to the Chantry." She licked the juice from her lips in a movement so guileless he knew beyond doubt he must taste her. He promised her the puppy and when they went to see it he had kissed her there amongst the dogs until his father came to drag him out._

 

 

He couldn't believe he had forgotten her. Her hair was shorter and her form fuller but those eyes. There they were. Like an idiot all that escaped his lips was, "You tasted like apples." 

"You promised Sebastian." There was nothing there that asked for anything more. She wasn't asking him to be the man he was. She wasn't asking for anything more than to be called by her proper name.

"Marian." He said as her name escaped on a whisper and as if the Maker himself had seen his weakness turned her head.

There was Payne, the puppy he gave her with the blanket in his jaws. "Where were you when I was being viciously beaten?" The dog cocked his head and wagged his tail a sound halfway between a whine and a groan coming out. She slid off his lap and snatched the blanket from his jaws. "Shut up I did NOT deserve it." She slid to the floor and wrapped the blanket around herself. She lifted one edge and Payne slid in wriggling closer to her licking the tears from her face. 

"Marian, I'm always here if you need me. I am a Brother and your friend. Either way you require of me I am here for you." He didn't know if his heart was swelling or breaking. _'I would never have made it this far without him.'_ The words echoed in his mind now that he knew what she meant. 

He almost didn't hear her as she mumbled into Payne pulling him close in a way he wished he was free to pull into her. "It helped. I just hurt so bad inside. It's my fault and I can't get the pain out. But its gone now. You took it and you made it stop."

"Any time Hawke. Get some rest." Sebastian left them then girl and beast curled on the floor of the chantry between pews. 

* * *

This time of night the Chantry was still and would likely remain so until the sun was up he slid into a darkened corner and stared at his hand. There was still a touch of moisture in his palm. He had been surprised when it started but it left him assured he wasn't hurting her. He pressed his forehead into the cool stone wall and prayed that the thrumming in his veins would still. He hadn't broken his vows. Maker he had never been closer than in that moment. As his own damp hand slid beneath his robes and stroked his own wanton need he prayed for forgiveness for his weakness in the midst of the sin. Shuddering he came with her juices upon the hand beneath his robes. He looked toward where she slept and said softly into the darkness, "Take care of her Payne. Take care of our girl. I can't always be there but next time. If she needs me. Come get me." There was a huff from the darkness and Sebastian was never convinced he and Payne had not just reached an understanding. He returned to his vigil of Prayer for Leandra and Malcolm for Bethany and Carver. But most of all for the Amazing wonderful girl they left behind. The girl he remembered tasting of apples sweet and sour on his tongue.

 

 

 


	2. The apology

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I swear I will get back to the main story next but this worked its way into my head and I had to do it. A much sweeter one shot that took a life of its own. It wrote itself. It was seriously just supposed to be the two notes back and forth.

Cullen didn't pay much mind to the elves and tranquil that silently floated into and out of the Gallows courtyard prefering to keep an eye on the Mages and Templars under his command. But the blond elf had been standing just five feet away staring at his feet for the last fifteen minutes. He turned his attention upon her slowly unsure of her intention.   
"Is there something I can assist you with today Serah?" The girl seemed startled at his address and smoothly stepped forward handing him a folded paper sealed with wax. She had the downtrodden look he had come to find common in so many of the Mages here in Kirkwall.

"My Mistress bid me deliver you this letter Messere." He smiled gently at the girl. So it was to be a new addition to the gallows then. Most Elves came to the circle when their employers discovered their talents and sent them by with little to no warning. 

He took the letter from her hands. "Could you wait just a moment I might have a reply." His confusion only grew as he saw the Amell Crest on the seal as he began to read, 

 

 

                _To Knight Commander Cullen of the Kirkwall circle,_

        _I would like to offer my sincerest apologies for my behavior last night._

_I have no acceptable excuses to offer. I was grieving and_ _had far too_

_too much to drink. I apologize for any embarrassment I may have  
_

        _caused you. You have my solemn_ _oath that I shall not invade your_

_personal space again. I can arrange to have Orana handle any  
_

_business I have within the walls of the gallows or allow one of my  
_

_companions to do so in my stead._ _It was never my wish to cause  
_

_you harm of any sort. I have found my peace with the Maker. It had  
_

_never been my intention to insult your faith.  
_

_Sincerely yours,_

_Marian Anne Hawke of House Amell_

 

 

Cullen stared at the letter a moment longer his heart caught somewhere in his throat. He looked to the girl who held so perfectly still one could have mistaken her for one of the statues that littered the courtyard. He had heard she was employing a former Tevinter slave. At the time he had dismissed it as another rumor of impossible magnitude but the girl was obviously not used to the simple freedoms. 

"Orana is it? I will return shortly with an answer if it wouldn't be too much trouble could you return with it?" She gave a small bob and nod.

"Yes Mast... I mean Messere. I am still supposed to be shopping today. Mistress has forbidden my return until it is complete though."

That did not sound like the Hawke he knew at all perhaps he had misjudged her. "Forbidden your return? What do you need to find before you can go back?"

"The Mistress commanded I purchase three things I didn't need sir." Cullen couldn't help it. He wanted something that made her worse. Anything that gave him cause to doubt the gentle respect for her beauty and strength that had snuck into his heart when he was not vigilant against it.

"Well how many do you have left?"

"All Three Messere."

Suddenly Cullen knew what needed to be done. After excusing himself he left notice for Meridith that he would be out for the rest of the day visiting potential recruits. He tucked the note under his armor in the pocket closest to his heart. Afraid of leaving it in his office to be found and misinterpreted he told himself.

Back in the courtyard he smiled at Orana. "I am most sorry I seem to be fresh out of stationary. Would you accompany me to the market so I might procure some?" 

She gave a small bob,"Yes Messere." Before long they were on the ferry back and headed into the Lowtown Market. Home was never far from his thoughts these days and he stepped into Lirene's Fereldan Imports. He picked up some stationary and spoke to Lirene behind the counter a moment. "That is Serah Hawke's elf. Could you see if you can help her some?" Lirene's eyes widened. The donation box was always heavy and Serah Hawke made a habit of selling her things slightly broken at very fair prices that could put refugee's to work to repair and resell at quite a profit. She swept around the counter.

"Is there anything I can show you? We just got some wonderful fabrics in?" Lirene's dazzling smile would have courted the wealthiest merchant and Orana was powerless beneath it.

"Thank you Messere. I would be honored to see your fabrics." 

 

 

 

Half of an hour later Orana had purchaced enough fabric to make three dresses. Cullen had it wrapped and went to lift the package when Orana made her distress known. "OH No Messere I can carry it on my own!"

Cullen blushed a bit. "I didn't mean to offend I was just worried how it would look. The big strong Templar forcing you to carry such a large bundle. I suppose I only thought of my own reputation as a gentleman." His hope to belay her distress only seemed to create an unconquerable battle of loyalties within her. As he watched one horror stricken expression after another flit across her face he tried again. "Perhaps I can carry it as far as a seamstress and you can have the dresses made. Then we shall have them delivered back."

The relief at being given a way out was palpable upon her features. "Thank you Messere."

The unlikely pair went from there into the Alienage. One of the mages had a wife there that worked for a tailor who he liked to check in on. After she had been measured for the dresses and the design chosen Cullen's stomach chose to make it self known. The grumble that came out sounded like an angry Mabari.

"I'm sorry. I skipped lunch today. There should be a stall just over here. Have you eaten yet? If not would you join me?"

The smile she gave him was answer enough as he stepped over and purchaced two meat pies. Handing her one they began to eat. After only two bites a young beggar came up and wordlessly Cullen handed him the pie and purchaced another. He was only a few bites into that one when another appeared. This repeated itself four more times before he saw Orana's question in her gaze.

"Their beggars. Some of them have parents that make them do it and some have no one. Money is too easily taken from them by someone stronger weather its by robbery or if they turn it over. Giving them something they think you neither want nor they have to answer for is the best thing to do. The pie will be gone before anyone can take it and their bellies full." Orana silently nodded but when the next beggar appeared she offered him her pie. The child took it with a smile and scampered off. Before long with Cullen's encouragement she had purchaced nearly a dozen pies and had begun to seek out the hungry and needy. Cullen was stopped by a Merchant who had claimed to have seen an Apostate. Emboldened by the day so far Orana wandered a bit off just around a corner to continue the task that was giving her so much joy. 

Had been giving her so much joy. She was suddenly pinned to the wall a drunken man pressed to her length. "I'd like a bit of your _pie_ elf." 

"You... You're more than welcome... to... to a pie Messere." And as she reached into the sack she was carrying he snatched it from her hands tossing it to the ground and began groping at the hem her dress. It wouldn't be the first time she had her body used. She tried to think of her little garden in Hightown. Before he got much farther though he collapsed against her and was pulled off with a snarl. 

"That's not what the lady offered Human." The newly arrived elf said standing over the crumpled form of the human.

"Are you alright miss?"  She drank him in. He was slight of frame and had the most beautiful ears. His long brown hair pulled back. His ears were... beautiful.

"I'm uh... Yes Messere. But what have you done? Will you be arrested for his murder?"

His smile made something flutter in her belly. "He'll wake up with a headache in a few hours. It's just a bit of poison. You see, I've got this friend. She's always taking up for people and defending them. When I saw him jump on you, I couldn't, well I couldn't not you know." 

"Oh, Thank you then. I know someone like that too. It does make me want to be better." He was picking her sack of pies up from the dirt. Handing them to her he took her arm gently.

"Come on. Darktown is no place for a lovely lady like your self. May I walk you back to the Alienage?" 

"Oh, Um I stay in Hightown. At the Amell Estate." The smile she got from him made her heart pound and her face warm.

"I will be certain to stop by then." Suddenly they were back in Lowtown and the Knight Captain was coming over. 

"Good afternoon Tomwise. Orana I thought you'd run off without saying good bye." 

"Oh no Master I'd never run off." 

If looks could kill he was certain Tomwise would soon be in the gallows standing trial for his murder.

"Knight Captain is fine Orana. I just needed to make sure you got the return message." He handed her the folded slip of paper.

"I leave her to your care Knight Captain." He bowed softly and backed up around the corner in a manner she had only seen in the Mistress's pirate friend. Cullen began to walk her back toward Hightown.

"Oh Messere... I mean Knight Captain, I haven't finished my purchases yet." 

"I think you have. You got a dress, a smile, and a friend." At her puzzled look he began to explain. "Not everything in life is a thing. You got a new dress. You bought those pies that made all of those children smile. And after the events of the day I would like to think you have a friend that you could visit anytime you like."  
"I didn't think of it that way Messere. I should be very happy to return to work then." They walked together a bit in companionable silence before he left her in Hightown and went on to visit the recruits he had mentioned to Meridith so as to not have it be a lie.

 

Orana walked into the house thinking of all that had occurred today. She had great hope Tomwise would visit as promised and it put a small smile on her face. The mistress's voice interrupted her thoughts. "Orana! Did you get your shopping finished?"

"Yes Mistress. I got a dress, a smile and a friend."

"Ohhhh kayyy?" Hawke pressed the cold cloth back to her face and Orana moved to refresh her glass of water.

"And Knight Captain Cullen sent a return message mistress." This caused Marian to sit up from her half reclined position on the couch with such force the cloth flew into the fireplace. 

Orana handed it over and scrambled to get the cloth back from the flames as Hawke tore it open.

**Serah Hawke,**

**At this time I do not feel I am owed an apology.**

**I understand your grief and you have my sincerest  
**

**condolences. Your absence from the Gallows will  
**

**not be required as with the rising tensions between  
**

**the City and the Qunari after the latest attack we  
**

**will soon need every ally and you have been a  
**

**friend to the Templar Order. As well as a friend  
**

**to myself.  
**

**Respectfully yours,**

**Knight Captain Cullen Rutherford**

 

 

That night Hawke fell asleep thinking of the Knight Captain's kindness. The Night Captain fell asleep thinking of the new friend he hopes Orana would find in him. Orana fell asleep thinking of her new friend in Tomwise hoping he could visit. And Tomwise drifted off full of pride thinking of Hawke and how she gave him the strength to do things like begin courting a Hightown servant.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I hereby gift this work to Semper_Paratus My first commenter on my first work! Who spotted two of three secret Cameos


End file.
